Dudes Doin’ Dude Stuff

Recently I met my buddy from The North in the middle ground of West Virginia for a weekend of camping with the little ones. He brought his tribe of three and Lil’ Man and I headed North to meet them at Holly River State Park. The women folk weren’t invited. Bam. I said it. Might as well have been a new meeting of the He-Man Women Haters Club.

We had never stayed at this park before but we recognized the entrance since we had ridden our motorcycles past it this spring when we met for our annual motorcycle camping trip. This particular park is perfectly in the middle of nowhere (just like the rest of West Virginia) with no cell service and a cool breeze.

Trust two man Eureka! tent for the Lil' Man and me.
Trusty two man Eureka! tent for the Lil’ Man and me.

It is nestled against a river (by name) but I think it is more of a creek due to the fact that there wasn’t much moving water. All of the sites were surrounded by mature trees so that made even the hottest of late summer days tolerable…or maybe it was the tasty beverages?

XL Slumberjack and the mini for Turd Ferguson.
XL Slumberjack and the mini for Turd Ferguson.

Thankfully I was able to pick a spot across the road from a playground and the kids definitely tore that beast up! My buddy and I were able to keep an eye on three out of the four from our camp chairs while the fourth one worked on burning every limb and log in the place. I taught them how to build a fire from nothing but true to most new generations they thought it wasn’t as cool as just tossing some lighter fluid on and going from there.

I wouldn't have bought wood if I had known we had a scavenger/pyro coming to the party!
I wouldn’t have bought wood if I had known we had a scavenger/pyro coming to the party!

Lil’ Man got to find toads, deer poo, centipedes, and salamanders so that was most definitely a win for him. He had never spent time with the other three before but everyone got along really well and occupied their time in good fashion. Of course at times it felt a little bit like Dumb and Dumber…

My buddy and I like to cook over the campfire but with four kids on hand we found it nice to be able to hit up with camp restaurant on the morning of departure. Nothing spells success like a couple eggs, hash browns, and sausage!

Homemade bread makes some good toast, son.
Homemade bread makes some good toast, son.
One satisfied camper!
One satisfied camper!

Wildlife is abundant in the campground and I was able to show the Lil’ Man the difference between and male and female deer; plus we spotted one of my favorite birds, the white-breasted nuthatch. You do have to mind your manners as you are camping in bear country but we didn’t have any angry visitors this trip, thankfully.

All in all I would recommend this park/campground to anyone. The staff is beyond friendly and we basically had the entire place to ourselves so it was nice and quiet. Of course, if you go whenever school isn’t in session I would expect to find more of a crowd.

Lil’ Man had a great time camping for a few days with his old man and The Hotness had an exercise in anxiety control since we were out of cell service. Everyone pulled through the weekend and I would go back tomorrow! Go out and check this park out or at the very least go camping somewhere else. Turn your celly off and shut your mind down. Spend some quality time with those that you love and make some new friends. Grill some food and make S’mores! Wrestle a black bear.

Hell, just get some fresh air.

Stomp Out Them Miles

Fresh air and a good set of boots strapped to your feet equals the start to a damn fine day. I used to be one to walk (with the company of my best and four legged friend, Cooper) roughly three miles every day but since I have become a stay-at-home Dad to Turd Ferguson and we moved to the country I haven’t had the opportunity to get out for a stomp on a daily basis. That being said I recently got out for a good lil’ hike with The Hotness and some friends visiting from Asheville. While Turd was hanging out with the sitter and working on his backstroke we headed North about forty minutes to the Daleville Park and Ride parking lot. Rumor had it that there was an obscure trail located at the corner of the parking area and we were set on finding it. I have to say that if you didn’t know the trail was there you wouldn’t have ever noticed it. Once we hopped on the trail we quickly met the Appalachian Trail and hiked up (and I do mean up) like billy goats for a good damn while. Near the top of the mountain there is a power line that you might not want to hang out by for an extended amount of time as you can hear it buzzing like a car battery powered lady love rocket. That being said, walk along the ridge for about fifteen minutes until you get to a fantastic view of Carvin’s Cove.

Behold the Greatness
Behold the Greatness

Even on a 90 degree day there was a great breeze along the ridge that cooled my core and there were plenty of kite birds soaring. It was awesome!

White, puffy clouds can't hold the deep thoughts produced. Solvin' life issues, son.
White, puffy clouds can’t hold the deep thoughts produced. Solvin’ life issues, son.

At this point you might want to turn around and hike back to town or you could keep going all the way to Maine. I don’t care. Whatever blows your hair back, sir.

We only had a couple hours before our babysitter time expired and this was a great little hike to get out and see some wildlife and appreciate the finer things of life…

ENO Double Nest Hammocks

Sometimes there is a need for such relaxation that you just don’t know how to tackle that feat. At the end of the day there isn’t much needed other than a trusty ENO hammock. I decided to rock out with the Double Nest in hopes that my lil’ lady would want to snuggle up but so far I am flying solo with extra room.

I have to say that ENO (Eagle Nest Outfitters) knows exactly what-in-the-heck they are doing. They are a lightweight hammock that is good enough for daily use as well as backpacking through the woods. Lightweight, well made, plenty of accessories, and tons of bad ass-ery to last you a good ol’ while. Colors depend on the year and production run but bug nets and rain flies are readily available, among other accompaniments.

Atlas straps and a Double Nest make for a good ol' time.
Atlas straps and a Double Nest make for a good ol’ time. Cutoff shorts available as an option.

A stuff sack is sewn into each hammock so you never have to worry about losing your gear. Atlas straps are what I settled on (also made by ENO) and they offer a ton of flexibility for attaching to just about any upright surface that you have for about $25-30 depending on where you order from. As previously mentioned, they stuff down right quick into their own stuff sack and easily fit into a pocket in your backpack or in your car. I would be comfortable using this as my main source of housing during the summer months without question!

ENO has your back. Check ’em out.

The Modern Man’s Guide to Memorial Day Weekend in West Virginia

I know what you’re thinking, West Virginia?! Fret not, Skippy, for I will spend my next couple minutes explaining why it is a good place to spend a weekend riding motorcycles and camping.

Let’s get the pain out of the way. I trailered my bike to West Virginia over the weekend. Ugh. Now that the band-aid has been ripped off I can continue. It is the first time I have trailered a bike to an annual dude motorcycle week/weekend and I felt guilty about it at first but at this point who in the hell cares? I’ve earned my stripes already and for this particular weekend it was the right call for my buddy and me.

A big ass tent for two guys and a lot of smelly socks.
A big ass tent for two guys and a lot of smelly socks.

At any rate, Bulltown Camp near Flatwoods, WV, is the first experience I have had camping in a park run by the Army Corp of Engineers and it was a damn good time. The price was right ($95 for 4 nights) and it had a bath house so what else more do you need? This campground was picked because we planned the trip late this year and it was the only place that had a spot for those four nights in the entire state, seemingly, and it was perfectly halfway for Rick James and myself.

Fate? I do believe, sir.

Our group is usually about 5-6 riders strong but this year it just so happened to be Rick James and myself for the weekend. As per usual I was the first one on scene and that afforded me the time to set up camp and prep the coffee percolator for Rick James’ arrival. Somehow it was a high of 55 at the end of May this year and if I could I would register a formal grievance against the Earth Mother as that is complete bull. Regardless, Thursday night was all about some coffee, a quick run for some grill items, and a nip o’ whisky before calling it in.

Surly Suzuki's final ride and the maiden voyage of the Harbor Freight trailer for Moto Weekend.
Surly Suzuki’s final ride and the maiden voyage of the Harbor Freight trailer for Moto Weekend.

Friday morning showed it’s icy face and we braved that shit like champs…at 10am as we were officially not on “Burt Time” (R.I.P. Burt’s ACL/MCL). One firewood run, two cups of coffee, and some breakfast later we settled on a route and quickly settled into a haze of not being in the zone. Rick James, bitch, and I were a little weirded out by the road conditions and decided to not turn it up to 11 as we rode Route 19S to 15E to 20N to Route 33 in Buckhannon. The goal was to ride 33 West to Weston for lunch but we couldn’t agree on where to eat so Rick James selected the glorious Wendy’s while leaving the lunch option for me on Saturday. Post feast we carved our way on 33 West until we reached Glenville at Route 5 South. At this point the thought of an ice cream cone from the fanciest restaurant in town (McDonald’s) was too much for Rick James to handle and we came to rest for a while. Route 5 was a decently fun route back to 19N/Flatwoods where we tanked up on grill items at the friendly Walmart before heading back to our site for the evening.

Rick James upset at having to share marshmallows
Rick James upset at having to share marshmallows

Saturday happened to be a better day out of the gate due to a better night’s sleep and a warmer morning. It still wasn’t summer temperatures but what can you do? After a couple cups of coffee, another wood run and some 40% RDA fiber oatmeal we risked everything and headed out for the day of riding. Route 19S to 4S to 16S to 39E to Summersville for lunch was almost what the doctor ordered with the exception of a certain GSX-R1000 tipping over at the intersection of Route 4 and 16S. The moral of the story is that maybe you shouldn’t be overly energetic and wave to a passing motorcyclist while you are mounting your bike on gravel on the side of the road after stopping for a pee break. How the hell did that happen? I don’t know but it was funny as shit and thank goodness for frame sliders. Hallelujah and pass the ammunition!

Post Bob Evans we hopped back on 39E to 20N which led us to 15W. We happened upon a lumber cutting contest/festival along the way and a pack of old ass vehicles that felt the need to operate at twenty miles per hour under the speed limit was the way to go. No matter how hard we tried to channel our inner Burt we couldn’t seem to shake the road clog that was killing us slowly. Why be on the road if you can’t do the speed limit? All it does is hurt those who you refuse to pull over for and honestly it probably kills a couple baby seals in the process.

Sunday, our day to make up for the pain before we head back to life and reality. Over coffee we plan the day’s route and decide to circle back on some roads we rode previously in 2010 near Seneca Rocks. We headed north on 19 to 33E where we had a glorious brunch at Huddle House (seriously fucking go there) before heading toward Elkins. After a quick 92 octane top off we headed south on 219/55 to 250/92. These roads are great if I must say so! We then turned south on 28 and rode to our second visit of the National Radio Astronomy Observatory in Arbovale.

Two pretty ladies
Two pretty ladies
Goldeneye and shit
Goldeneye and shit

The large dish in the background is really huge like the one from Goldeneye but the picture doesn’t do it justice. You can take a tour of the facility and I have to admit that I will circle back one day but we were on a mission to ride this particular visit so we didn’t take the time.

Serious business
Serious business

Route 66W is sweet and at the town of Cass there is a scenic railroad you can ride and I do plan on heading back to that with the Lil’ Man and his Ma. We headed north on 219/55 and that is a great section of pavement! After stopping for an ice cream treat at a gas station we took 15W back to Flatwoods. What a day! Route 15 was the worst part of the day due to a clog of vehicles towing other vehicles but what can you do? It was a great weekend of riding and we covered 620 miles in the three days we were in town.

A lot of people have bad things to say about West Virginia but at the end of the day there is some great riding to experience if you ever have the chance. On road and off road I have to say that West Virginia has something for everyone!

Good times and good friends with motorcycling to boot…I can think of worse ways to spend a weekend!